"Do you not understand? I may die in this cell tonight or in the arena tomorrow. I am a slave. What possible difference can I make!"

In the movie the Gladiator there is one scene where Maximus is chained up talking with Princess Lucia.  Maximus says to Lucia,” Do you not understand? I may die in this cell tonight or in the arena tomorrow.  I am a slave. What possible difference can I make!

Lucia responds,” Today I say a slave become more powerful than the E

mperor of Rome.”

I am just a girl from Southampton Massachusetts but I have this vision. I have this dream. How strong am I? How far can I go? What will I learn?

 “What possible difference can I make!”?

After my session this past week with Tyreso I was on the buss home and I felt so genuinely happy. I can’t explain it.  My heart was almost racing. I could not sit still thinking about everything that has happened and everything that is about to happen.  My mind wandered back..

You’re too small.. You’re not strong enough.. Your will never play again.. You are wasting your time.. You should just quit..

Words that I know to well and have heard to often but also words I never believed in.  Now I am in Sweden living the impossible dream; working for it everyday.

We have had a few games; one game against my old club IFK Gavle.  It was a great game and my team had one of our best games of the season. We played as one and we got the win. It was fun to play against IFK and it was great seeing them all again!

 Then we played against Bele Barkarby in Stockholm. The field was not in the best condition but I try not to complain about that because both teams have to play on it. We started the game off well but it was not connecting as it did when we played against Gavle… Passes were a little off and we were a step behind at times.  

Things were not going our way but everyone kept fighting.  We lost the battle. Bele Barkaby played well, but we are a better team; we just had a bad day.

 Soccer, as in life is a bunch of little battles; you have good days and you have bad days. Barkarby had a very good day and deserved to win the game.

Now, we have had time to regroup, refocus and got ready to take on the leader in our series Bollstanas. It was on our home ground!!

The game against Bollstanas was exciting. We had some good combinations and created some opportunities but did not finish our chances. Bollstanas is a strong talented team and we fought.  We were down 4-0 in the second half and I scored in the last 15 minutes. The game ended at 4-1. 

Yesterday we had a home game against Roslagsbro.  Thinking about the past two losses I was hungry for a win.  We control our own destiny. I want those three points. I felt in the moment and had a good feeling.  I thought about my role, my strengths and how I can impact the team. 

We scored very classy goals. The first goal came off of a good combination and a perfect pass across the goal for Anna (our forward) to finish it off. The next goal was similar.  I had a few looks on goal. I took a shot outside the 18, I hit it just right, I already had my arms in the air in celebration but then it was ruined by the crossbar/post  (note to self don’t play crossbar challenge all week with my kids before a game)

 In the second half we kept our lead and played very well defensively.  In the last 10 minutes of the game Lina had a nice breakaway with two defenders to beat, I made a run through and Lina played me a perfect ball so I was one on one with the goalkeeper. I placed it and then I could finally throw my arms up in the air in celebration. It was Lina’s goal… without that perfect pass I would not have scored.  It was a great game for us; we played well offensively and got a shut out defensively!! It is coming together and getting better and better every game!!

This month has been, not even month but my time in Sweden so far this year has gone beyond my expectations.  I feel as if everyday I have a new story to tell or a new adventure to go on.  I think back again.. 

You’re too small.. You’re not strong enough.. Your will never play again.. You are wasting your time.. You should just quit..

“What possible difference can I make?!”

I want to be the one everyone goes to on the field, the one to make a difference; both as a player and as a coach.  I will always take the risk!  Now I’m here. I’m here, Continuing to Dream, Do and Believe.