I remember my recruiting trip to
Florida Southern so clearly. I met my first two Swedes; Linda Hoglund and Anna-Sara
Sedin.They were a big reason why I
choose to go to Florida Southern.
The next year Anna-Sara was not at the school; all I heard was that she was in Chicago. I found out that she had been
diagnosed with lung cancer in 2008… and past away January 7th 2012… The same day as Meghan… I still don't understand why and my heart will always be heavy on this day..
I met Anna-Sara quite a few times during my years at Florida Southern and I am so honored for the very short amount of time we had together... some of our
conversations are ones I will never forget… She knew what life was really about..
“F.E.A.R
Forget Everything And Run
OR
FACE EVERYTHING AND RISE”
In anything in life, it is about making the
choice… Making the choice to be the best, making the decision to do whatever it
takes no matter what happens or what others say... Letting go. EXCELLENCE IS A
CHOICE… A DECISION.
When Anna Sara was diagnosed with Lung Cancer
she did not have much time… She decided ok then I will travel, really live! She made
the choice to let go and truly live!!
Anna Sara comes from a small place near Sundsvall. My first year in Sweden I played against her old team in the Swedish cup. I
contacted her brother and he came to the game!!
The day
before the game, my team was saying “They are one division higher… They are one
of the top teams. We are just division two. We are going to lose but at least
we get good food...”
This made me angrier and angrier... They have
already made the choice to lose before even stepping on the field!! They already
made the choice to be lower than what they could be…That is a disgrace… Those thoughts… That is
an excuse. That is FEAR…. THAT IS RUNNING.
Why do anything if you are going into it like
you are going to fail??? I wrote to the team that night about my thoughts and
everything changed… They made the choice to strive for excellence.
We came to
this game focused. We did not win, but the fight my team had was more than
anything I could ask for... All we could do at the end of the game was shake
their hands because we gave them everything we had and we did not stop until
that final whistle blew! I was so proud to be apart of IFK Gavle on this day!!
I met her brother after and we were both crying...
Now I am on my way back to Sundsvall… This time
as a head coach in the Elitettan. The youngest coach, girl, blah blah... So
much has happened.We have had a rough
start, lots of talk, adversity, etc. Every player is capable of so much more
than they think but it is a choice you have to make and it is a great choice if
you really take it. I told my team before the game that we have to make the
CHOICEand make the choice TOGETHER! WE
HAVE TO MAKE THE CHOICE TO PLAY LIKE WINNERS, TO WIN, TO BE EXCELLENT. TO DREAM!!! Lets dream together!! Lets make that choice together, to FACE
EVERYTHING AND RISE.
Anna Sara did not have much time, but she decided to make her last time (which turned into years) the
most worthy she could. She let go and lived longer than expected... So now we have a choice... A choice to
play , a choice to strive for excellence, a chance to enjoy. Let's be like Anna
Sara by letting go and making THE CHOICE TO LIVE!!"
My first game back after my last
surgery was at an indoor tournament at my club’s facility. I had not played one
minute in a year.. Now, we are in the final and go to Penalty kicks..
In my club if you want to penalty you take
it!!! You have to have the courage and be willing to take the responsibility to win or lose the game... Only those who want it get it!
It was important in my club; COURAGE…
My assistant coach asks, "who wants the
first PK?" I raise my hand along with everyone else and he laughs and says, "haha Jackie nice try" he picks someone else...
Then asks again for the second,
third, forth and I raised my hand along with everyone else getting the same
response, "haha Jackie come on"
Then on the 5th when he asked no
one on my team raised their hand... Only me ... And because of this
"rule" he got frustrated and said, "come on someone needs to take
the 5th kick... You all raised your hand before!!!!"
Everyone said,” Let Jackie take
it... “
He asked the head coach and he
said "she the only one?"
He said, “yes!!:”
"Let her take it"
It went down to my shot. If I
made it we won... I have not played in a year and my debut with this team is in
this final taking the "winning" penalty…
I walk there and my heart is racing but I am also
calm. I am nervous and excited… Ready... I put the ball down and as I approach
I see the goalkeeper move early so I chip the ball and while she is on the
ground the ball slowly bounces in the goal and we win the tournament!!!! My
team rushes to me!!
I think of that feeling and I
have the same feeling now… I'm stepping up to the penalty stop with that feeling of
nervousness as well as excitement.. Outside of my comfort zone but also ready! I
feel this sense of freedom to bring my dream to life, my vision to life!! I am
walking to the line and I am ready to take the shot!! Ready to take that
responsibility to win!! Ready to score!!
"Play it safe and be good or take
the chance and be great…” I want to take the chance I want to be great!!!
My mind wanders again….
November 2016
My friend Lollo Schillgard is now
playing for the Boston Breakers!!!! We were training on a field near her
apartment in Stockholm. I creating an exercise where she is working on driving
the ball from the flank to the inside searching for different spaces to create
a shot… I added pressure as a defender and it got really intense!! All of the
sudden out of no where we started going 1v1; total street at 8amon a small
field in the middle of the city…
She went around me with this sick
move (I must say), I grab her shirt as she comes around me, pulling her down, she
shoots and scores this insane goal; upper 90.. I fell to the ground with
complete exhaustion. She goes to her knees in celebration with complete joy,
fists pumping and yelling like she won the World Cup…
We got completely taken away!!
Besides the “shame” I felt of her beating me (haha) seeing that joy, that
passion, that moment was better than any high I could ask for..
I help her up and in my mind I
see her scoring this amazing goal and me celebrating as a coach in a stadium in
from of 90,000 people… I hear the crowd, see myself screaming in celebration
doing the unthinkable… I see it so clearly my heart is racing… I also see Lollo running and falling to her knees again after scoring that
magical goal.. "Winning the hearts of the mob"
Two dreams.. One as a coach, one as a player…
The same passion… The same magic… My mind comes back to reality and we are in a
small part of the city, in a fenced in field and we are training like it is a
World Cup Final!!! That spark, those magically moments, that is what it is about that is what I am
after!!
I think of everything now and the
dreams I have had and have and its like ive “seen it before” I have lived the
situation before, rehearsing this great performance in my mind over and over
again… Finding keys… Then all the sudden the vision you see, this dream you
have becomes a reality. The dream comes to life!! I truly believe if you see it
you become it and I see it so clearly!!!
"The vision that you glorify in your mind, the ideal that you enthrone in your heart - this you will build your life by, and this you will become."
"The heart has eyes the brain knows nothing of"
I want to create something so
great that you cant take your eyes off it, so great it makes you disappear…
Where you are lost in the awe of the moment; Magic…
I hear “That was magic! Your session was magic. This moment
was magical. What you do is magic.”
Magic… What does magic really mean? -Something that takes
your breath away?
This dance is magical,
this play is magical, this moment is magical, being able to move after a
naprapat fixes you is magic, this conversation is magical, this training
session is magical… a goal, a smile, a joy… the joyful moment. It is something you will never forget.
Magic: Definition
Noun
1.The
power of apparently influencing events by using mysterious or supernatural
powers or art.
2.Wonderful;
exciting
3.Any extraordinary
or mystical influence, charm or power. Special Power, influence or skill
4.Mysteriously
enchanting
5.A
power that allows people to do impossible things by special words, tricks or
performing special actions
Verb
1.Move,
change, transform or create by or as if by magic
Perform: Definition
1.To
carry out, to execute, to do.
2.To carry
into effect, to accomplish any action involving skill or ability.
3.To
fulfill a command, promise. To entertain.
I danced for 9 years. The dance company in my town,
Hackworth School of Performing arts is one of the best! My friend Teddy Forance
and his family are dancers and they are basically doing what I do with fotboll
but with dance…
I was thinking about these two words Performance and Magic
and my mind went back in a time where I was watching a performance and I felt
the “magic”… My mom and I were watching a dance recital; Teddy came on stage… I
have not seen him perform in awhile and when he started to move I became lost
in it, lost deeper and deeper within every movement… He made time freeze and I
lost my breath. This was breathtaking.
He made me completely disappear where all that existed was him on the stage. It
was absolutely incredible!!
I went on YouTube and I watched one of my favorite
performances from him.After, I had
training with a focus on possession in the midfield and then I thought of
Teddy, this performance, when I danced, what my dance teachers have said to me,
and how they set up and created a choreography.It clicked…. I found a key…
Creating a
Choreography
When you are creating a dance within a group the teachers
talk about finding the “windows”, with these windows every dancer is seen at
all times.
I think… The player with the ball is now the “audience” and
the rest of the team needs to find the different “windows” (space) to be seen.
I watch this stand by me performance again and I see it so
clearly……
Stand By Me
These three guys
“attack in three” -My team attacks in three or more and defends in these
attacking triangles I call the Bermuda triangle.
They have “Happy
feet”-Their feet are always moving. My players’ feet are always moving. There
are no “sad feet”
Positioning- They
have different positions whether it is group/team positioning or individual positioning
and they interchange just as we do in fotboll.
Spacing- They
focus on spacing- the distance between the player (or ‘dancer’) attacking and
defensively, whether it be in triangles, diamonds etc.
They have a game plan-
a choreography where they attack, defend and have different movement transitions
from attacking to defending and defending to attacking.
Special Skills-
Each dancer, each player has a special skill and their stage or the field
serves as a place for “self expression” They use their special skill and
strength to make everyone look good and make each other better.
Balance- There is
a balance between “improvisation and structure” They have a structure they follow
but they have the freedom to “Improvise” within the structure.
Windows-No one is
hiding everyone has a role within the performance. Everyone has a role on the
team. If your friend is hiding you have to catch her, help her up so she finds
her window again. HELP YOUR TEAMMATE UP!!
Audience- They
are not only there for themselves and their teammates but they are also there
for the audience… To PERFORM! You have
to be “there” and be ‘support’ for the player with the ball.
The Audience also becomes the support to the players, dancers or team.
The crowd- In the
great words of the gladiator “Win the crowd and you shall gain your freedom.
Win the hearts of the mob” “ I will win the crowd. I will give them something
they have never seen before” They not only win but they PERFORM!
What does it mean to truly win???
-I win but don’t play well and I am not happy or satisfied…
-I lose and play well but I am satisfied?
-What would you rather??
-But to achieve excellence and become a ‘champion’ do you
need to find a way to win when you don’t play well?
-To play well you win?
To win and play well is the ultimate victory!!
Work, Trust,
Commitment- I base my team’s philosophy on these three things. In this
dance performance you need a lot of trust
and commitment in oneself,
teammate, coach and plan and you need to work
to perfect it. Outwork every opponent even if that opponent is your self. Just
as in this dance, trust to jump into
your partners arms knowing fully that they are there to catch you. That they
are there for you, to do everything in their power to make you look good
because they know that you are doing the same for them!
ONE- They become
one in this performance but they keep their individuality. They use their
individuality to create “ONE” They are the same but have a plan to use their
individuality to lift the group and the performance.They put their strengths together to perform
or reach a common goal (like scoring in fotboll) or creating an unbelievable
show to not just be great but really really great!!
Freedom- create
an environment where you give the game back to the players or the stage back to
the performers, where they have the freedom to express themselves. How do you
find your freedom?
Relating to football.
The player with the ball is the audience; the players off
the ball are the performers and need to find the “windows” where everyone is
seen.My players have FREEDOM within the
plan/ choreography where they are free to express themselves. They use their
strengths to lift the team and the team lifts their strengths! Everyone has a
role in the victory and to make the performance great. No one hides.
Why be there if you hide? Take the responsibility to have
the courage to be seen.
I see that everything that has happened to me, every
experience and every person that I have met (friends, family, professors, old
dance teachers, and coaches) has helped me create my philosophy!I keep adding, adapting and creating to come
to that magical moment.
You see just tiny glimpses of magic from time to time.I think of a magical time and magical moments
and want to bring that to this great game not only win but also perform and
create MAGIC. Something so great that it makes you disappear!
